Life is only a fantasy
We never get what we want
But instead we loose what we got
Things always come up for either
Better or worse
But in my case always worse
When you think you got something
It’s lost in a blink of an eye
When you always think positive
The worst happens
And when you expect the worst
The positive is more rewarding
When it isn’t expected
But unfortunately
Things happen for a reason
But the risks we take
Is something to never give up trying
But only you have the answers
The questions you have to find
I have always said this to my friends
Your past is who you are
Your future is what you become
Now is what you do
You have one life to live
Make it memorable for others
A heart of stone is what I am
A statue is what forever I will be
But if given life
Hell will be reaped with the mightiest force
The world has never seen
Think of the times
Pain has brought up memories
Capable of killing your soul
And all you fight for
Seek your desire of what you feel
And pursue it
To the farthest point of insanity
For insanity is a feeling
That is always felt
But never unleashed
Fearing what its capable of
If you know what it is
Capable of then use it
For the desire of the heart
But remember it’s uncontrollable
So will it be regretted being unleashed?
Or will it bring pleasure to comfort the pain
Nothing can comfort what is locked in my heart
For no one knows
What is locked in my heart
I only know that I’m afraid
Of what it might be
I don’t even know what lies
In the darkest bowls of my heart
For my heart is no mystery
But the meaning of true horror
Is what you’ll find in there
Or even possibly the meaning
Of “Death”
For he is the greatest of all
Killing with no emotion
But only enjoying what he does
As I do the same
I enjoy the pleasure of giving pain
Not known to normal people
Only people like me understand what its like
Except when it comes to those that matter most
Like a friend who gave me a second chance
Don’t even know how to react to such
Well I don’t even know what it is called
A second chance
Is that what it feels like to be normal
To be excepted by a person
For who they are and not what
Is this the start of being a person?
“Aaaaaahhhhhh” the pain
It won’t leave me alone
It feels as if I’m be putridly
Being eaten inside out
And my head feels as if a mallet
Is smashing it
Blows harder every time
With the pain of before the last
I can’t win
I feel power less
I’ve been deemed of what I was
For changing and wanting to be normal
I need to remember who
I was
Wait!
Who was I?
What was I doing?
What’s the point of being?
Why can’t I answer this?
I don’t understand
But my friends do
They always know these things
But the real question is
What is a friend?
And can they be trusted
Can anyone be trusted?
I think so
But i'm afraid of screwing up
Like I always do
And so I ask
Will I risk it?
And will it be worth risking
Who knows only time will tell!